words from my head

Gas prices

2011-08-04T18:20:00.002-05:00

Better technology causes higher gas prices.

I think it's true. The more fuel-efficient cars we produce, the less gas we use - or at least we use the same amount of gas, but less often. Thus, the oil and gas companies lose out on significant profits. If your current car gets around 20 mpg, and you go out and buy a new car with about 30 mpg, you just reduced your annual fuel costs by 33%. If a typical tank of gas is $50, you are basically saving $16.67 per tank over the year (in a round-about sort of way). You can see how that would add up quickly per person per year. And that's just with automobiles! Think of how electric or more fuel-efficient motors in industry would add to this!

Oil and gas companies are just like any other company - they exist to make a profit. If their profit starts to slide, they figure out ways to raise it up again. Today, this means higher prices at the pump. So I say unto you: quit your whining. Higher gas prices is your fault!

Hooray capitalism!

The Return: Thoughts on the Future

2011-06-19T11:48:00.004-05:00

Hello everyone! It's been over a year since my last post, and I'm glad to be back, spreading my thoughts across the interwebs. A lot has happened in the last year, but I'd like to start with something I've been waiting to post for months.

We moved my grandparents down to Texas from Missouri almost 2 years ago. As happens with anyone who lives long enough, their mental and physical health have been failing in their old age. I've noticed, however, that some habits and preferences continue to live strong.

The assisted living center where they've been staying was kind enough to cut a hole between their two rooms and install a door, giving them a bit of an apartment. It's great. Because my grandma has required much more aid, nurses come and go regularly; the door is always unlocked. And, because there is no need, there is no lock on the door between the rooms.

This afternoon, Kelley and I will pick up Grandpa to go visit Grandma in a rehab center, where she's staying temporarily. We'll celebrate Father's Day while my parents are out of town, and sit and chat together. We might even play cards. But when we pick up Grandpa and walk out of his room together, he will leave the light on and lock his door.

I'm not sure why he thinks he needs to keep the light on or lock his door in an assisted living center. I can't imagine that if anyone did steal anything that they would get very far with it. I guess securing your property is just one of those things that you never stop doing. Or, maybe it's one of the last things he is able to control himself.

No doctor or nurse, no son or daughter, not even his old age can stop him from keeping a bit of normalcy in his life. He lives in a different type of home in a different town in a different state, surrounded by different people. And yet, a small piece of metal in his pocket and a switch on the wall are all he needs to hold on to "normal". Or perhaps all he has.

I can't imagine what it must be like to see your own mind and body failing day after day, year after year. It must be torturous. I will have the same issues he has: allowing others to not only help me, but becoming dependent on others to help me will be impossible. I can only pray that God will spare me that pain in my old age and that he will grant Frank peace and mental security today. For he is still my mother's father, and we love him.

In Passing

2010-07-07T22:59:00.005-05:00

She turned to him, eyes red, and gently patted his knee. "Ben, that makes you the oldest cousin now - on both sides." He remembered his father's wobbly voice in the message left early that day.

Emotion was whirling around him. What if it had been him? They were only two months apart in age, after all. What if it had been his brother? Tears came up.

He thought about his cousin's wife - all alone in a foreign land, family so far away. He thought about his aunt and uncle, who lost a son. He thought about other cousins, who lost a friend. He thought about himself, who would never see a cousin again.

He hadn't legitimately cried in a very long time.

Pain. Sadness. Confusion. How? Why?

* * * * *
Something like two weeks ago, Kelley texted me that three of her chickens died. I thought she was joking. She wasn't.

It turns out that a small gap developed between the chicken wire and wire mesh at ground level - a gap just big enough for young chickens and ducks to escape their protective lair. The dogs were released, as they are first thing every morning. Shuffling. Barking. Chirping. Commotion. Two chickens were found dead outside the fence. One duck lost feathers, but made it back inside the fence safely.

Curiously, it appears that a snake killed the third chicken inside the fence - probably over night. Realizing that the bird was too large for its mouth, the snake must have moved on, leaving the fowl half-eaten.

It took most of that morning for Kelley to finally figure out where the gap was and get it patched up. We're still confused as to how it got there in the first place.

* * * * *
We don't know why or how these things happen. Yet seemingly random events are all part of a divine plan. This perfect, unknowable plan is what runs our lives - each and every one of us. From the death of a relative to the death of a pet, each and everything that happens to us - no matter how trivial - is part of God's plan for us.

We may never know the reasons behind them here on earth, but we can rest in the knowledge that God does. And he is perfect. That makes his plan perfect. And his reasons perfect. One day, we'll be in front of him ourselves on the day of judgement, and we can ask. Until then, we must go about our daily routines, taking the punches as they are thrown.

Such is life.

Giving the Bird

2010-05-26T19:30:00.012-05:00

Kelley loves birds. She also loves miniature things. She's talked about having some chickens and once almost bought a crate of thirty baby chickens on the internet because that was the smallest amount the company would ship. She's serious about wanting chickens. May 18 was Kelley's birthday. Her roommate Heather and I surprised her a week early with eight chicks and two ducklings.

The chicks at about 5 days old.

The ducks at about 6-7 days old. The one that looks headless has his head tucked down and away. Heather got jealous and bought herself one, too, hence a total of three.

I am surprised how quickly they grow. The ducks have about doubled in size. The chicks have wings and the beginnings of tail feathers, and they've begun "flying" as they jump around. Part of the present was my promise to convert the horse stables at their house into a chicken coop, and it actually seems to be a lot easier than I anticipated. They say you need one box coop for every 4-5 chickens. I'm building four, just for kicks. They'll sleep in the converted horse stable, but be free to roam around outside in a fenced-off area I'm also building during the day. Chicken wire all around with a foot of wire mesh below ground to prevent raccoons, rodents, foxes, and coyotes from digging under to get the feathered ladies. More wire mesh in the stable window, above the half-door, and in open spots around the ceiling for ventilation. Plus Crony Manor will have free, fresh eggs!

The ducks are of the Muscovy variety. According to the World Wide Web, they are ducks that fly around, not away, meaning that they'll sleep in the coop every night, but fly around all day (once they learn to fly). They make wonderful pets for this reason.

Anyways, I'm packing up and moving out of the Mohican Mansion. Going up with the rents to see my cousin graduate high school this weekend. Not sure where I'm living next week, so I'll be couch surfing for a week or so. Blah. I need a job. Blah some more.

Choices

2010-04-15T15:22:00.002-05:00

For those who haven't heard, I have some life-changing choices to make in the next month. I am currently an intern/Assistant Programming Director for CollegeLife. I have been asked to stay on for the next year or so and be trained to be the Programming Director when Ross leaves (the current). That's awesome! What an honor! Naturally, I already know all of the tech-related things having to do with the job; I would mostly be trained in the planning, mentoring, and creative elements. I might also join Tom Nelson's Men's Program in the fall to learn more about the Bible, church history, and theology - all things that would enable me to better minister to the students of CollegeLife.

That's what that half of the decision is: making ministry my career. The other choice is the military. You see, the two cannot coexist - ministry as a career, that is. (As a Christian, I am called to minister to those around me wherever I am, whatever I am doing. I'm talking about going into full-time ministry as my career/job. Getting a paycheck.) If I were to become a pilot in the Air Force Reserves or Air National Guard, I'd go away for about 2 years of training, then possibly be taken overseas once or twice for several months. Not very conducive to ministering to collegians who may only be around for one or two semesters. You can't very well develop deep, intimate relationships or raise up leaders when you're not around, now can you?

Thus, I'm left to chose one or the other. I'm leaning to the military choice now, but I'm not making any final decisions yet. More prayer and consideration is in order. Any from you is welcome as well.

The Trip

2010-03-25T17:07:00.000-05:00

Wow. What a week in Minneapolis! I co-led a team of all girls; I was the only guy on our team of 7. Of the almost 25 or so who went to Minneapolis, I was one of only 6 males on the whole trip. But it was awesome.

I'll keep it brief. My team basically evangelized all week. We took public transportation and walked around Minneapolis and St. Paul just talking to people - either for a local neighborhood church or on our own. There were so many great conversations with people. I'm working on videos for each of the five places (Minneapolis, St. Louis, New Orleans, Atlanta, Eastern Tennessee) CollegeLife sent teams to, and they'll be up on the CollegeLife website soon. Check out the Minneapolis video to hear stories and see other things we did there.

All I can say is God is good. It seemed like every day we'd learn about something in the morning, which would prepare us for someone we'd meet that afternoon. We had great conversations with people about why they don't go to church or why they're bitter at the church or what they believe, etc.

Oh, also, we went to an almost-all-black church on Sunday, the second day we were there. It was the best church experience I've had in my life.

I like the Twin Cities.

#554

2010-02-28T23:24:00.002-06:00

While out at a local Denton establishment, my housemate and I saw a show on the TV that basically looked like a reality show in a women's prison. One of the inmates caught our eye because she was being examined by a doctor...because she was pregnant.

Which raises the question: what happens to prison babies? When a woman gives birth while incarcerated, what happens to her child? Does she raise the child in prison? Do they force the child to be put up for adoption? Can the mom send the baby to live with friends or family? I have no idea. It's an interesting question.

What should happen to the baby? I'm not sure I know that either. On the one hand, I'm inclined to say, "It's your own stupid fault for getting knocked up and then getting arrested. Clearly, you can't handle another life in this world," and make them give it up for adoption. Doesn't the fact that the mother is in prison clearly demonstrate that she is not capable of raising a child at this time? On the other hand, it's her baby! She should be able to send it off to friends or close relatives or foster care or something and get the child back once she's out.

But what if she's in for 10 years? or 50 years? or life? I have no idea. Anyone know anything on the matter?

Decompression

2010-02-21T23:28:00.003-06:00

I was sitting at my computer playing Bloons Tower Defense 4 just now when I began to become annoyed with Zach's guitar playing in the other room. It's 11:28PM, after all, and I have to be up early in the morning. I'm just killing time before I go to bed. Decompressing, if you will. Letting my mind relax before I sleep. It's what I do. I can't just jump into bed after going 90 mph all day. I need to ease into it.

And that's when it hit me. Zach is doing the same thing. He frequently diddies around on the guitar late at night when he's tired. He may not even realize it, but that's his way of relaxing his mind before he goes to bed. And I looked across from me and saw Taylor also playing BTD4 and listening to music on his headphones.

Living in a house of 5 young adults is taxing. Strewn about the house are clothes, dishes, crumbs, instruments, video game paraphernalia, papers, chairs, and instruments. People are constantly coming and going - both us residents and friends/acquaintances. We're constantly doing ministry-related things: teaching Sunday school, running Axcess, leading a life group, mentoring a younger guy, etc. We need these little times to decompress and step out of life for just a moment. Taylor and I play mindless flash games. Zach's fingers wander about a guitar's neck. We all have something. I understand now. I'll let it slide. He needs it. Just like I need BTD4.

Life is so much better when we understand one another. Good night, blogosphere. Good night, Zach. Good night, BTD4. Hasta mañana.

Snow Days

2010-02-13T16:56:00.004-06:00

If you haven't been around lately, it snowed a lot here recently. And by that, I mean it snowed the most it has ever snowed here. For all time. Literally. DFW airport had an all-time record of 9.4 inches, and my girlfriend's house had about 11 inches.

Those of you in more snow-friendly environments *cough* (Colorado) *cough* may be thinking, "Golly. That isn't much snow at all, mother." To which your mother would reply, "No, dear, it isn't to us. But Texas is further south and in the gulf plains. That state hardly ever gets that much snow. It's just like how our temperatures are much less like the inside of a volcano during the summer like it is in Texas." "Oh, I didn't know that before, mother. Thank you for the kind lesson in regional weather."

My roommate, Taylor, made the news though. About 26 seconds from the end, he gets a giant snowball dropped on his head, then turns around laughing. Enjoy!

Dear Blog, I miss you. -Ben

2010-02-13T16:30:00.002-06:00

Right. So I'm leading a team on the CollegeLife Urban Experience Spring break mission trip (UrbEx) to Minneapolis this March. Co-leading, that is, with one of the other interns actually. She'll handle the gals, I'll handle the guy. That's right - singular.

You see, there were about twice as many girls who signed up to go on the Spring break mission trips as guys, so each group is pretty short on dudes. And then when each life group stays together, you have even fewer in most groups (and more in a few). 29 people were split into three teams for the Minneapolis trip. Including me, there are 3 male leaders and four other guys. 7 out of 29. Yikes.

CollegeLife is also sending teams to New Orleans, Atlanta, St. Louis, and Eastern Tennessee. In each of these cities/regions, the teams will venture into the poorest, most run-down, most neglected, most uneducated, and/or least Christian areas to help out in various ways. This could mean helping rebuild a destroyed city, tutoring elementary kids, painting a church, or feeding the hungry. But at all times, we are expected to live the Christian life and spread the Word.

I'm not afraid to tell you that I'm uncomfortable with all this. I have only been on one mission trip in my life. As you may recall, I went to Chicago with DBC on an UrbEx trip in 2007. It definitely changed the way I see missions. However, does going on one previous trip qualify me to lead others on a similar trip? Hardly! I barely know what I'm doing! BUT, God knows what he is doing.

My co-leader has been on several mission trips. She's comfortable with the whole scene. She's an accounting major at UNT, so she loves organizing finances and will be dealing with all the money and receipts. She's also very detail-oriented. I, on the other hand, am a bit of a people person. I think I'm good at getting people motivated and leading them to accomplish tasks. Thus, we're the perfect match to lead a team together. Way to go Michael Pirtle, planner extraordinaire!

Anyway, we have about a month to gather $350 so I may be hitting you up for help. :-) I only know one other person on my team, so I'm anxious to see how this goes. Anxious, but excited.

Baby, it's cold outside!

2010-01-08T10:19:00.006-06:00

According to the weather channel at 10:05 AM, it was a balmy 18 degrees outside. And with the wind, it feels like 3. That's Fahrenheit! That's the same as -16 degrees Celsius! Cold!

Invisible (No I'm Not!)

2010-01-04T11:22:00.002-06:00

It's funny how easily it is to ignore others. It's funny how easily it is to pretend someone is invisible when they're sitting right next to you. I think this happens far to frequently with the elderly, mentally handicapped, and children.

Take, for example, my grandparents. We were all over at their place on New Years Eve just sitting around visiting. We started talking about how Grandma has/hasn't progressed physically on certain things, and how she likes this but doesn't like that, and on and on and on. BUT SHE WAS SITTING RIGHT THERE! We were talking as if she wasn't! How can we do that so easily? I'm sure she's thinking (if she can hear us very well, which is an entirely different issue), Why don't they just ASK me? I'm sitting right here!

It goes like this: someone asks Grandma about something. She either can't hear and just gives a vague answer or answers something that isn't true. (Like she says she wants to eat a pig-in-a-blanket when we all know she can't physically and she'd hate it anyway) So then Mom or Grandpa changes her answer to the correct one. Then someone asks Mom or Grandpa something related to the topic at hand. A conversation has begun. Mom or Grandpa talk a little softer so Grandma doesn't hear them talking about her when she's right there. Anyone would do that. But then after a few sentences, the conversation level gets back up to regular talking volume, and we're all talking about someone who is sitting right next to us.

How are we able to do this so swiftly and unknowingly? Maybe we think, "oh, it's just a kid. They won't know what I'm talking about." Or maybe, "Grandma can't hear that well anyway, so it's OK." Or maybe, "Their mind just isn't able to understand what I'm saying." But how can we know any of that is true? Doesn't everyone know that kids are like sponges and soak up everything they hear and see? If Grandma can't communicate very well in her old age, how do we know what she can and can't hear? Maybe she just can't tell us very well what she can and can't hear.

I have mixed feelings about all this. It is necessary to talk about Grandma's issues, but not in front of her...right? But it would look equally strange if we all suddenly got up and left to go talk in the other room, leaving her all alone for a bit! And her hearing really is pretty terrible, so she probably can't hear us anyway. But does that make it OK? How would I like it if someone was talking about me when I was right there? Not very well. I'd want to get in on the conversation. Unless, of course, I didn't know or understand what they were saying.

...and round and round we go...

Infamy

2009-12-07T09:50:00.002-06:00

It was said that today, December 7, would live in infamy. Looking back through US history, this may be true. But there has been a lot that has happened on this day throughout the years. Here are a few of them, according to Wikipedia, The History Channel, and The New York Times:

1787 – Delaware becomes the first state to ratify the United States Constitution.
1796 - Electors chose John Adams to be the second President of the United States.
1917 – World War I: The United States declares war on Austria-Hungary.
1941 – World War II: Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, Hawaii.
1946 – A fire at the Winecoff Hotel in Atlanta, Georgia kills 119 people, the deadliest hotel fire in U.S. history.
1965 - Chevrolet produces its 3 millionth car.
1970 – Rube Goldberg, American cartoonist, dies (b. 1883)
1982 – In Texas, Charles Brooks, Jr. becomes the first person to be executed by lethal injection in the United States.
1987 – Pacific Southwest Airlines Flight 1771 crashes near Paso Robles, California, killing all 43 on board, after a disgruntled passenger shoots his ex-boss traveling on the flight, then shoots both pilots and himself.
1988 – Yasser Arafat recognizes the right of Israel to exist.
1993 – The Long Island Rail Road massacre: Passenger Colin Ferguson murders six people and injures 19 others on the LIRR in Nassau County, New York.
1999 – The Recording Industry Association of America files a lawsuit against the Napster file-sharing client alleging copyright infringement.
2002 - Iraq denied it had weapons of mass destruction in a declaration to the United Nations.
2004 - Hamid Karzai was sworn in as Afghanistan's first popularly elected president.

words from my mouth

2009-11-18T22:34:00.003-06:00

It has recently occurred to me that there are several words and phrases that I say, perhaps, too frequently. These include bummer, sweet, that's hilarious, son of a biscuit, and awesome. I'm not sure why I say these things as often as I do. I suppose everyone has catch-phrases or expressions that they say regularly, but maybe we just don't notice them.

What do you think? Do you say something a little too often?

words from my head

2009-11-16T08:59:00.002-06:00

Life is good right about now. So good, in fact, that I'm seriously considering going running as soon as I finish this post. (I haven't been running in months)

To answer your obvious first question, things with Kelley are going swimmingly. It's like each day is the best day, but then the next day is better. She's pretty awesome. My favorite part of our relationship is how often we can see each other. It's usually not planned, either. Like, I'll post on Twitter and Facebook about doing Campus Cam for CollegeLife one morning, and she'll come sit with me after her class. Or when she forgot about Daylight Savings two weeks ago and showed up to church an hour before she needed to be there, we went out for breakfast at Whataburger. All around greatness.

My CFL team is killing. I captain the Hurricanes, and we are holding first place at 7-1. I suppose technically we're tied for first, but we have more overall points and a higher point differential than the other team. Many more. And much higher. My team is great. We usually have just enough players to play the two games each Saturday morning, and I am physically hurting each Sun-Tues. But we play very well as a team. We spread the ball around so well that I'm pretty sure everyone has scored at least one touchdown. Everyone does their job on defense so well that most everyone who's played off the line has gotten at least one interception. Whether we have everyone there or hardly anyone there, we all play hard and play hard together. I love it.

My grandma is in Texas. There has been a lot of family drama over the last few weeks, but I think it's beginning to come to an end. It has resulted in Grandma moving from Missouri to Texas into an assisted living center within walking distance from my parents' house. I'm going over tonight to help move some furniture items out of a moving truck. The only bad part of that story is that Grandpa is still in a hospital in Missouri. We're not entirely sure what's going to happen to him over the next few weeks, so please pray for his mental and physical health. I haven't ever lived in the same city as my grandparents, so this should be pretty neat!

We interns had our monthly Supperfest last night. In July, we manterns wanted to show the femterns how much we appreciated them (as they are compensated in no way whatsoever for their service to CollegeLife), so we had them all over for dinner and games. They wanted to cook for us the next month, but we said, "No! That defeats the whole point of what we were doing! We wanted to treat you!" But they would have none of it. They cooked for us in August, we played more games, and Supperfest was born. Every month, we've been trading off who hosts whom. Last night we played no games, and instead just talked. It was nice. I don't see most of the girls on a regular basis, so it's good to reconnect each Supperfest. We have a great group of interns this year. Really great.

My housemates are the best, too. Taylor and I have been sharing the big room ever since LoPresti moved down from Virginia. Taylor is a lot like my brother Daniel, actually. Scientific, technical, similar sense of humor, same age, similar personality and character. It's a little creepy. Either way, we get along pretty well. All the guys do, really. It's pretty swell. I'm glad for each of them being here.

Man, that was much longer than I anticipated. Sorry about that. I'll leave you with my three most favorite classical pieces of all time:

The Firebird Suite by Igor Stravinsky
Rhapsody in Blue by George Gershwin
Cello Suite No. 1 in G Major by Johann Sebastian Bach

Priorities

2009-10-28T21:14:00.003-05:00

Have you ever noticed how we Americans have a different set of priorities when looking for a job, for example, than a lot of other cultures?

My mom and I were looking at the final round of assisted living centers for her parents today at lunch. They aren't really physically able to care for themselves any more, so we're probably going to move them down from KC, MO in the next week. Mom wanted another set of eyes to see everything and think how they would like it. She was telling me how a lot of immigrants are nurses in this industry. Not doctors. Nurses. I asked why, and it seems that is, hands down, the fasted way to get your green card. Interesting. So rather than going to medical school to become a doctor and make zillions of dollars saving people every day, they take the quicker route of becoming a nurse.

This accomplishes several things. 1.) They get a well-paying job relatively quickly. 2.) They are able to provide for their entire family (which may include parents, aunts, uncles, etc.) with said well-paying job. 3.) They are able to obtain permanent residence in these United States relatively quickly. What more could you ask for?

When I think back to this spring and summer when I was looking for a job. The first thoughts were Is it doing something I'll enjoy with people I'll enjoy? Is it something I know how to do? Will it pay well? Is it something I want to do? Does it provide benefits? And on and on it went. I was very self-centered. How does it benefit me? I'd wager that much of the rest of the world is very family-centered. How does this benefit my family? How does it enable me to provide for or spend time with my family? And so on and so forth.

What do you think? Am I right? Am I wrong?

Deuteronomy

2009-10-24T08:16:00.002-05:00

When was the last time you poked around in this, the fifth book of the Bible? I thought so. Here, many laws and rules and ways and means are laid out for the Israelites by God. It can be kind of slow because God always repeats himself several times when talking about important things. "Do ABC like XYZ. In the way of XYZ, do ABC. ABC shall be done by XYZ." I was just continuing my reading of Deuteronomy while eating breakfast this morning, and I was astonished what I read - THE GREATEST, MOST ELABORATE THREAT OF ALL TIME!

At the end of chapter 26, God's commands are wrapping up. In chapter 27, we hear about building an altar and people are cursed if they do things against God. But chapter 28 is the best.

It starts off with ways you'll be blessed for obeying God, then goes into ways you'll be cursed if you disobey God. Verses 58-59 and 62 summarize it well:

58 If you are not careful to observe all the words of this law which are written in this book, to fear this honored and awesome name, the LORD your God, 59 then the LORD will bring extraordinary plagues on you and your descendants, even severe and lasting plagues, and miserable and chronic sicknesses....62 Then you shall be left few in number, whereas you were as numerous as the stars of heaven, because you did not obey the LORD your God.

Basically, you screw up and God destroys you. But like I said, this is only a nice summary of the wrath God will bring down upon them if they don't obey his commands. It starts back in verse 15 and continues all the way through the last verse of the chapter! That's 54 verses! It's like a page and a half in my Bible! There are a couple of places (like v58-62) where it looks like God's done threatening them, but then he picks right back up one or two verses later. It's fantastic.

I love a good threat.

Oh, Happiness

2009-10-21T12:34:00.002-05:00

David Crowder*Band's new album, Church Music, is pretty amazing. I have the song "Oh, Happiness" stuck in my head. Always.

I'm sorry I've neglected you recently. A lot has happened in the past few weeks. Let's see. Working for CollegeLife is amazing. I've learned so much about videography. I LOVE it. The staff and my fellow interns are the best, too. Couldn't have asked for a better setup.

I've also learned a ton about life and my faith in talks with my housemates and Jeff, the CollegeLife director. He meets with us manterns every other week to go through a book together, or the Bible, or talk about our lives. He's the man. Click here to watch him on stage at Axcess and other videos made by yours truly.

I went to the Texas State Fair on Friday. Always a great time. If you've never been, you're really missing out. It's a blast.

I also went to the Relient K concert in Dallas Monday night. Man, they put on a good show. There were two opening acts - first Barcelona, then Copeland. I thought Barcelona was AMAZING. They had energy, good tunes, and rockin guitars. And of course, Relient K was the big act. They played a couple of covers - possibly better than the originals - The Office theme, the "5 Dollar Footlong" Subway theme, "Under the Sea" from The Little Mermaid, and "Island in the Sun" by Weezer. "Under the Sea" had some heavy electric guitars on it, which was cool. Anyway, good times were had by all.

There's also a new lady in my life - Kelley. She's pretty great. Kind, patient, fun, social, active, cute, beautiful, smart, engaging. For those Facebook stalkers out there, you already know we're dating. Congrats. For everyone else, we're dating. Hooray!

Until we meet again....

unbelievable football

2009-10-05T09:31:00.000-05:00

School Spirit

2009-09-24T00:05:00.004-05:00

While I was at UNT the other day, I entered into discussion with someone about school spirit. We noticed how several people were walking by wearing other schools' shirts. UT. TCU. Basically, not UNT shirts. While I had always noticed it before, the thought never occurred to me until now: why? Why are you wearing a shirt from one college, while you're attending another?

I have a couple shirts from LeTourneau University, but I was a student there for three semesters. There's just no way that every student wearing a shirt from another school actually went to that school. I mean, why would you leave UT to go to UNT? Not the likely answer.

Instead, we decided that school spirit was the culprit. We determined that school spirit--in college--is based almost entirely on two things: sports and preference. The first is obvious. If you're football team is awesome, you want to support them. If your basketball team makes it to the Final Four, you represent. The second also makes sense. If you REALLY wanted to go to Texas A&M, you're going to have A&M stuff. If you're super smart and/or uppity and/or wealthy, you might have Ivy League stuff.

But no one cares about the nation's top chemistry department or lacrosse team or trombonist or whatever. That just doesn't inspire school spirit. UNT has a phenomenal music department. But how do you turn that into school spirit? UNT has an up-and-coming business school. But how do you make people excited about that? I'm not sure you do. Maybe a lack of school spirit is OK. After all, UNT is the third-largest school in Texas. And that can't be a bad thing.

So for those who are banking on a stellar football team in the next few years, get over it. It may not happen, and it may not matter. Let's be good at that which we are good. And if we're lucky, we'll get to watch some good football, too.

TLAP

2009-09-18T14:03:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow is International Talk Like a Pirate Day. I expect to hear many "avast, me hearties!", "shiver me timbers!", and "ahoy ye unworthy bilge rat!" exclamations from all of you tomorrow.

In related news, I'm helping to photograph my first wedding tomorrow. Merely the assistant. Just learning. But do you think they'll have a pirate-themed wedding to commemorate the holiday? I hope so. I'm going to wear my eye patch and shirt with the sewn-on stuffed parrot.

Stormtroopers' 9/11

2009-09-14T14:12:00.002-05:00

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

September 11 - Patriot's Day

2009-09-12T02:56:00.002-05:00

The Clapper

2009-09-09T00:09:00.000-05:00

Taylor and I just got some for the lamps in our room. Possibly the best money we've ever spent.

Spam

2009-09-01T12:49:00.002-05:00

I haven't checked this in a while, so I was curious. For the month of August, I had 617 spam emails sent to me. That comes to just shy of 20 spam emails per day (19.9032 to be more precise), as compared to a mere 367 - or about 12 per day - back in September 2007. Something's not right about that.

Guy Starts Dance Party

2009-08-30T15:47:00.001-05:00

Parking in Driveways....Not

2009-08-20T00:36:00.002-05:00

Why is it that everyone only parks in their own driveway? I'm in a book study with the other CollegeLife interns, and we've been going over to Jeff's house every week to discuss and chat and eat and relax. I've noticed that no one ever parks in Jeff's driveway. It's big enough for four cars, but Jeff's is the only one ever there!

I started thinking, and I realized that this seems quite common. Normally, when you go visit someone else's house, you'll park on the street in front of the house. If both sides fill up, you park at the neighbor's house or the next house, and so on and so on. But no one ever parks in the driveway. Why? Where are they going to go? It's their house. They're hosting the gathering. If they think the party's bad enough to leave, we should all leave anyway.

It's very strange. Any ideas?

New Driver's License

2009-08-13T18:36:00.003-05:00

So apparently Texas decided to get a new driver's license layout (old above, new below). It looks a bit girly to me. Whatever. And now I'm a donor!

Lord of the Dance

2009-08-12T11:06:00.002-05:00

If you're not sitting, you should sit. By the way, how do you do stuff online while not sitting? Are you walking while looking at your iPhone or Blackberry or something? Standing in an elevator? Either way, you should have had ample time to sit by now.

I went dancing last night. Swing dancing.

I know. That's what I said, too. But, you see, my housemate Josh goes every Tuesday to a place down in Ft. Worth. They have great instruction for an hour or two, then you get to dance as long as you want after that. So he's been nagging the rest of us to go with him cause he thinks it's the bee's knees. I finally broke down and decided to give it a good, old fashioned college try. Loads of us went, and much dancing was had by all.

I feel the need to interject into my story at this point. Most people have fun dancing. When they dance, the feel happier. When they hear music, their bodies just start moving to the beat, and they can't help but dance. I am not one of those people. When I dance, I feel drained of life. I feel like a dementor came upon me and sucked away my soul. (sorry for you hp anti-fans) When I hear music, my hands and fingers start moving - I need an instrument NOW! I hear the bass line, then the harmonies, then little things that no one else hears - like the shakers.

I tried so hard last night to get it right. But it was like I was shouting, "Feet! Come on! Let's go! Pick up the pace! We're trying to dance here!" And they were saying back, "Dude. I'm trying to stand here. Leave me alone. Quit shouting. Just chill man. Just chill." My feet don't flow to the beat. My hips don't move in any rhythm. I was doing sort of OK when I did the two or three things I learned earlier in the night, but if I ever tried to make something up on the fly or transition between moves, mothers covered their children's eyes. It was not a sight to behold.

The girls we went with were more than kind enough to help me along and teach me some things. But man, it was just so much work. I'll probably go back a couple of times, just to give it a chance. You know, it was my first time in years, so I didn't really know what I was doing. You need time to learn. But I'm not expecting much. We shall see....

Bruno Kammerl jumps

2009-08-10T19:17:00.002-05:00

100 Books from the BBC

2009-08-07T16:25:00.015-05:00

Via Rachel

The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books here. I've highlighted the ones I've read (25 in all). How about you?

1 Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings – JRR Tolkien
3 Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series – JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four – George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials – Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations – Charles Dickens
11 Little Women – Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles – Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 – Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca – Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit – JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong – Sebastian Faulk
18 Catcher in the Rye – JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveler’s Wife – Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch – George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind – Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby – F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House – Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams
27 Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows – Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield – Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia – CS Lewis
34 Emma-Jane Austen
35 Persuasion – Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha – Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh – AA Milne
41 Animal Farm – George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney – John Irving
45 The Woman in White – Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables – LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd – Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale – Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies – William Golding
50 Atonement – Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi – Yann Martel
52 Dune – Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm
54 Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy – Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind – Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities – Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World – Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night – Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck
62 Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History – Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo – Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road – Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary – Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children – Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick – Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens
72 Dracula – Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden – Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island – Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses – James Joyce
76 The Inferno – Dante (well, parts of it)
77 Swallows and Amazons – Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal – Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair – William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession – AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas – David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple – Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day – Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary – Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance – Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web – EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection – Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince – Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory – Iain Banks
94 Watership Down – Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces – John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice – Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet – William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables – Victor Hugo

Control

2009-08-06T10:24:00.000-05:00

I like being in control. In fact, I've been told I handle myself extremely well while multi-tasking under intense pressure. I like to have a say in everything I am exposed to. I like making things better. But mostly, I like doing what I like doing.

Lately, I've been pretty down. First, I keep kicking myself for being so close to my dream of being a military pilot, but quitting. I totally know I should have, but I was so close! It's the principle! Second, being out of a job for an extended period of time blows. Hard. I like to keep busy. Third, I've feel like I've been spiritually alone for at least a year and a half. It's mostly my own fault, though, as I haven't really opened much up to many (...any) people.

I guess that's the thing though: it's very hard for me to truly open up to someone. I've gotten really good at saying things that seem like I'm opening up, but they're mostly surface issues for me. I tend to hold on to the root issues, even when I know what they are. I like having control over my emotions, over my feelings, over what people know about me, over myself.

And then there's that pesky God fellow. Always trying to have control over me. I can't make him go away. He's everywhere, always knocking at the door. No matter what I do or think or say, I always am reminded that he wants me. "So, OK, sure, God, you can have me." My problem is that he won't tell me what he wants me for. Or if he has, it isn't what I want, so I haven't heard it yet. "Come on, God! We're on Earth! This is my life! We're playing by my rules!" That never works. (At least not yet. I'm going to keep trying until it does.)

I am very thankful for the CollegeLife staff and my fellow interns in this regard. I have only been here about 2 months now, and I am already being challenged to submit myself to a local community of peers and neighbors and the greater community that is the church. I know this is exactly what I need, but it's not what I want. I can't be in control if I submit to someone else! Who's crazy idea is this? Oh, right. It came from Jesus. Psssh! (Details.)

So, the coming weeks and months will be interesting. I expect I'll be humbled and proven wrong in big ways. I'm not looking forward to it. (But I am.) Not one bit. (Yes I am. Several bits, in fact.) Wish me luck and pray for me. I need it. (And control. I need that, too.)

How Reading Ruined My Life

2009-07-24T00:56:00.004-05:00

I am not, by nature, a reader. I am a watcher. I prefer movies to books. I prefer to be shown how to do something rather than reading the manual. It's just how I was made. That is, until three and a half weeks ago.

Just before moving back to Denton, I was challenged to re-begin reading the Bible on a regular basis. This is something I've always struggled with. It bores me easliy (see above). I had just begun reading Genesis when I moved up here. Not because it was the first book, mind you, but because my interest was peaked by a sermon topic the previous week.

I began moving into the "Mohican Mansion," as it is known, about four weeks ago. One of my roommates had Jon Krakauer's book, Into the Wild sitting on the kitchen table. When I sat down to eat lunch one day, I saw it there, and began reading the intro/forward/preface (which ever it was). I'd heard it was a good book, so I wanted to see what it was all about. The next thing you know, I was several dozens of pages into the book! I finished it two days later, and rented the movie to watch another day or so later. Somehow, I was consumed by the story.

But now, my life is completely rearranged. I can't stop reading. I can't escape the bound-paper jungle. I'm now done with Genesis and almost into Leviticus. While simultaneously reading the book of John (on assignment) to learn about what it means to be a true disciple of Christ. While simultaneously reading Dietrich Bonhoeffer's book Life Together for an intern/staff book study. While simultaneously reading a book on audio mixing I found in the back of my roommate's car - Mixing Audio by Roeey Izhaki. (which, by the way, appears to have been translated from Arabic or something. Poorly. And they forgot to run spell check and grammar check on it. Twice.)

I don't understand what has happened to me. Why can't I stop reading? Why am I simultaneously reading four books? Think of all the time that's being wasted! I could be sleeping or eating or watching a movie! Or just doing nothing altogether! I just want things to go back to the way they used to be. They were happier, simpler, more ignorant times. And I had so much more free time. Alas, such is life. Such is life.

#527

2009-07-18T01:08:00.002-05:00

Have you ever been up late, you're tired, you're bored, so you start surfing the Net? Have you ever been bored or tired in the afternoon, so you go get a snack? These happen to me all the time. Why do I do it? Why don't I go to bed? or take a nap? or do something I should be doing instead? It's very strange. And yet, here I am....

Worlds Collide

2009-07-18T00:53:00.005-05:00

The universe just exploded. Hell froze over. Pigs can fly. OK, not really. But almost. I started following a few magical musicians on YouTube last year or so when I was working at JamStudio. Two of them, Greg Holden and Julia Nunes, apparently went on a mini tour together and appeared together in a YouTube video (below). This is especially peculiar, as Julia is from upstate New York and Greg is from the UK. But they're both awesome.

It's weird when things come together that aren't supposed to be together. Like at my bro's wedding. There were people from my dad's side of the family, people from my mom's side of the family, church friends, co-workers, and former neighbors. It was rare that any of these groups should exist simultaneously in the same space. I could deal with that. But all of them all at once? That was just too much for me. So what did I do? I forgot that I put a Snickers bar in my back pocket earlier that morning. I had messy pants. It just goes to show you what can happen if you combine everyone in your life. Don't do it. Just say no. And stay in school.*

* Unless you graduate. Then, think about going to college. If you graduate college, think about going to grad school. If you don't want to pursue a higher degree, then don't stay in school. But everyone else should.

Phone Tag

2009-07-16T19:06:00.004-05:00

I'm not really sure what made me think of this all of a sudden, but I had to draw it. It's just too funny not too. :-)

Outies and Lions

2009-07-16T18:18:00.002-05:00

This is a very clever Australian commercial on the subject of having Smarter Energy. I think this sort of thing is how our generation will decide on what action to take (if any) in the matter.

Sour

2009-07-15T13:52:00.000-05:00

Rach, I don't know where the heck you find this stuff, but it rocks.

Rockumentary: Episode 4

2009-07-14T00:00:00.001-05:00

We Have Band - You Came Out

2009-07-09T18:05:00.000-05:00

Just saw this on Rachel's blog. AMAZING.

New People, New Places

2009-07-09T17:35:00.002-05:00

I haven't said much of substance in recent weeks, mostly because there hasn't been much to say. But now, I am moved in to my new house, and I have begun my new job as the video intern for College Life at Denton Bible Church. So far, I've mostly just gotten to know some people and begun organizing/cleaning the room in which I will do most of my work. (It was pretty jacked up)

I have three housemates - Taylor, Josh, and Zach. Taylor and Josh were both residents of mine at Clark Hall when I was an RA. Now we live and work together. Strange. But all three are great. We all seem to get along quite well, so I'm excited to see what this next year will have to bring. I'm also excited not to be living alone again. When I was in McKinney, I was far from everyone I new. And since I worked far away, I didn't really have time or a reason to meet new people. It was rough. But now, I could hit the building I work in from my house with a rock, and I live there with other guys around my age.

The only "real" things I've done so far are the Sunday night Bible studies and the Tues/Thurs morning Matrix. The Matrix is like a discipleship class for those college kids who are here over the summer. We interns (us 4 guys and about 7 girls) all help set up everything and cook pancakes for everyone every Tuesday. The thing is, though, that The Matrix is at 6am. Which means that we have to get there around 5am to start setting up and cooking pancakes (only on Tues, as I said). It's been pretty rough some days, but I've already learned a lot about various things from the talks. There are some gifted speakers at this church with excellent perspectives on topics. Good stuff.

Anyway, just wanted to give the updates on things. Oh, I already have my ticket to go see the next installment in the Harry Potter series. 11:59pm Tuesday night. I'm excited.

Transformer

2009-06-24T03:15:00.001-05:00

Free At Last

2009-06-22T21:46:00.004-05:00

I was just ripping a couple of old CDs to iTunes. On dc Talk's 1992 album Free At Last, they have a track entitled "2 Honks & A Negro". I laughed out loud.

New Tobacco Law

2009-06-22T14:29:00.003-05:00

Today, President Obama signed a new bill into law. Essentially, a bill that gives the FDA the power to regulate the tobacco industry. Click here to read the full text of the President's remarks.

What do you think about this bill? I have mixed emotions. On the one hand, it makes sense for the FDA to regulate such things. Tobacco is a drug. It's the Food and Drug Administration. Makes sense. But to continue putting limits on advertising and packaging seems silly to me. If we really, truly believe that tobacco is that bad, then why don't we ban it outright? I don't care one way or the other. But if it's bad, let's get rid of it. If not, stop pretending it is. Can I get an "amen"?

Rocumentary: Episode 3

2009-06-20T20:48:00.002-05:00

Username: benjumper

2009-06-13T05:26:00.006-05:00

For those stalking me on Facebook, you may now bookmark my profile with a new address. This morning, Facebook allowed users to create their own username, so as to make a more pretty web address. (and to join every other social networking site in the 21st century)

You may now find me at http://www.facebook.com/benjumper. Hooray for Facebook!

(I think this even works if you're not signed up on Facebook. Double hooray!)

Saved By The Bell

2009-06-09T14:03:00.001-05:00

Video Recaps | Full Episodes | Webisodes

The United Countries of Baseball

2009-06-08T22:27:00.003-05:00

I saw this on one of those Facebook quizes, and found it online here. I love it.

The Long and Winding Road

2009-06-08T21:59:00.001-05:00

My brother, Daniel, was married on June 6, 2009 in Eastland, TX. It was exciting. He did, however, have a few doubts on the way out there the day before. Watch and see.

Computer Rap

2009-06-08T21:53:00.005-05:00

My brother showed me this program he had on his computer that makes the computer read text in a robotic voice. Naturally, we made it read the theme song to "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air." Enjoy.

Rockumentary: Episode 2

2009-05-27T23:10:00.000-05:00

Stuff Christians Like

2009-05-26T23:12:00.004-05:00

For those who pay attention, you will have noticed one of the blogs I follow to the right: Stuff Christians Like. My friend Bethany turned me on to it a few months ago, and it is hilarious. I literally laugh out loud when I read it. Here are my favorite quotes from an old post from April, "Buying a new Bible. (The 9 easy questions you need to ask yourself.)":

The downside to the Super Giant version however is that it’s 19,000 pages long, weighs slightly more than a Kia and comes with a moving dolley to get it into your car.

2. Do you want a Bible that would make sense in the movie “Red Dawn?”

Wow, two free gold ideas in one post. ... Why don’t I have a multi-book deal and pants made of hollowed out diamonds stuffed with gold yet?

So the moral of the story is: you need to check out Stuff Christians Like. It rocks my world. In fact, I'd go as far as to say it was megamazitasigasmic. Enjoy.

Ben, The Other-Starter

2009-05-21T11:29:00.000-05:00

I am, by no means, a self-starter. By nature, I procrastinate, invent excuses, and avoid things I should be doing in life that I don't really want to do. I am, however, an excellent other-starter. I'm great at getting other people to do things. Why do you think I changed my major from engineering to marketing?

In any group of people I've been associated with over the last several years, I was the guy who said, "hey, let's go _____!" I was the one who got the ball rolling. I was the one to call everyone to set a time/place to have lunch. I am currently in the process of pestering some friends to set a date to go to a Rangers game. And it just occurred to me that I've been doing this so that I can have a social life.

I want a social life. I need a social life. I care about a social life. But the problem is that it takes too much effort. And I quit. I just don't have it in me any more. I'm tired of being the other-starter all the time. I want a break. I want someone to call me for a change. I want someone to randomly invite me to lunch on Tuesday. I want a bunch of guys to pile out of a truck and tell me that we're going camping. Now. Is that too much to ask?

Later that day...

Crap. Now I'm all alone. That was a bad idea. Pride blows.

* * * * *

Is there room for more than one other-starter in a group? It would appear not.

Give A Squirrel A Helping Hand

2009-05-17T22:26:00.002-05:00

via M:

Give A Squirrel A Helping Hand @ Yahoo! Video

Strengths Finder 2.0

2009-05-14T11:41:00.002-05:00

My mom bought a couple copies of Strengths Finder 2.0 the other day for my dad and me to take the test. You see, each book has a unique code that you need to log on and take the test. The test asks you about 30 minutes-worth of questions, similar to a personality test, but it tells you your top five strengths. I just took it, and here are my results with a brief description of each. The actual test gives you a whole paragraph, but I won't go into such detail now.

Responsibility
People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.

Relator
People who are especially talented in the Relator theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.

Belief
People who are especially talented in the Belief theme have certain core values that are unchanging. Out of these values emerges a defined purpose for their life.

Analytical
People who are especially talented in the Analytical theme search for reasons and causes. They have the ability to think about all the factors that might affect a situation.

Strategic
People who are especially talented in the Strategic theme create alternative ways to proceed. Faced with any given scenario, they can quickly spot the relevant patterns and issues.

So what do you think? Do you agree with that brief synopsis of my life? If you get a chance to take the test yourself, I'd be interested to see what your top five strengths are.

The Search II

2009-03-30T10:15:00.003-05:00

A number of you have asked what kind of job I'm looking for. Some of this can be found in my previous post, but I'll give you a list just to be sure. It's nice that people want to help me out. I'm going to help you help me.

* * * * *

I have a degree in Marketing with a certificate in New Product Development. I worked for a start-up website for about a year-and-a-half (JamStudio.com), which was awesome. I think I really like start-ups. I also like advertising, though I have no experience in that area. I don't so much like sales, but I suppose I'd be foolish not to consider it.

I was a computer programmer/database administrator/application developer for a few years. I set up a SQL Server, created and developed one application, and developed and programmed another to talk to the SQL Server and graphically display information.

I've already applied to a couple of universities for various jobs, but I'd like to either work in the advertising/marketing department or the housing departments. I like college kids, so it would be neat to work at a university where I can interact with them and/or do things for them. I was an RA for 2 years, which is where I first "got the bug" as they say. It was fun. I just don't want to have to live with college kids any more. That means I will not be a hall director or anything like that.

I've also discovered I have a passion for church. Playing guitar, running sound, working with kids, etc. There are a number of things I like to do for the church, but just the idea of working for a church has excited me recently.

My dream is to be a military fighter pilot. As I am not yet a military fighter pilot, it would be neat to be able to work somewhere where I can get some experience that will help me later. Like being a plane mechanic, where I can learn about the aircraft systems. Or working for an airline company like Southwest, where I can learn about the industry if I want to do that after retiring from the military. Of course, I have no knowledge whatsoever in any area relating to aviation other than some basic flight principles my dad has taught me over the years. But to at least get into the industry would be neat.

* * * * *

Aside from those more targeted fields, I like doing things that are different. Like working at the website recently. I got to play music, edit all the little sounds, try to get the word out on the web, and make a couple of how-to videos for YouTube. Not many people can say they've done something like that. Also, My work varied from day-to-day, and I was doing something that made a difference in people's lives.

I've always avoided retail or fast-food or something like that. You know, things that are considered typical teenager jobs or typical college jobs. I just never had the desire to "just have a job". I always wanted a "real job". I have so far, and I'd like to continue if possible.

So, for those who have asked, I hope this is a good idea of what I can do and what I want to do. If you know of anything I'd appreciate the heads up. All ideas are welcome. In the mean time, I'll keep searching on my own. Thanks!

The Search

2009-03-27T21:49:00.002-05:00

It's been a while since my last post. Frankly, there hasn't been anything worth posting about. I've been looking for a job for a couple of weeks now, and I'm getting tired of it. That's not a good thing, considering I don't know how long I will be jobless. Of course, I could get a part-time job at Best Buy or Target or something, but that's not a 'real job' for a college graduate. Thus, the search continues.

My biggest problem is that I don't know exactly what I want to do with my life. Being a military pilot seems to be on hold for the moment. So what else do I want to do? I have no idea. I know about some things, but maybe not enough to get hired in that field. Like audio engineering. I know how to run sound and how to use a sound-editing program, but I don't know if I'd be good enough to get hired to work in a studio, for example. Or music. I can play guitar, bass, piano, but maybe not well enough to start a band and become famous. Or computers. I taught myself how to program (more or less), so I certainly don't know enough to be a professional programmer. It's quite frusterating.

Besides that, I'd like to find a job I'm somewhat interested in. Over the last few months, I've realized that I would really like to work for a church or university. But I'm not sure what I would do there. I've applied to a couple of schools for various jobs, so we'll see if anything pans out. I even applied to work at a church doing some tech stuff. But like I said, I don't know that I have enough knowledge/experience for them. We shall see.

I need a "Eureka!" moment where the skies open up, the angels sing, the light shines down upon me, and I realize, "Yes! This is what I want to do for a living!" That would be awesome. But as I don't forsee that happening, I shall continue to send out resumes and fill out applications and send emails and make phone calls. It already bores me. But it will lead to a less boring life where I make money instead of not make money. So I will press on. Such is life.

Facebook Dating

2009-03-07T21:30:00.003-06:00

OK, I know this sounds crazy, but I've just learned of a new teen phenomenon called "Facebook dating." (for realz)

Andy
why i love high school ministry - guy went from being "single" to "in a relationship"
15 minutes later
guy went from being "in a relationship" to "single"

Ben
hahaha
nice

Andy
ask them about it. he said it was an awesome time of learning, but after going on a date, they thought it wouldn't work out

Ben
wow. short date

Andy
that's what i said

Ben
was it like between classes at school or something?

Andy
haha, you ready for this
facebook date

Ben
what?
what does that even mean?
*hangs his head in shame*

Apparently, it means to fb chat, comment on photos together, do stuff on various fb applications together, post on each other's walls, etc. It all seems a bit non-date-ish if you ask me. But they didn't. So there you go. Kids are dating via Facebook now. Crazy.

Compare People

2009-03-07T21:13:00.002-06:00

You may be one of the millions of people who have the Compare People app on your Facebook profile page. I, too, have said app. I was looking through my rankings out of boredom and curiosity, and I found my results to be quite interesting.

Of all my friends, I am ranked #27 with the best hair (I won 4 out of 4 comparisons). I assume that is pre-shaved head. I wonder what I'll be now....

I won 2/2 on "more likely to win in a fight". I wonder who I was up against for that.

Only 3/5 for best smile. I'll have to practice.

As for the ladies (and maybe some of the men), they ranked me 4/5 better catch, 2/2 rather kiss, 3/4 better body (have you seen my body? really?), 2/2 rather date, 2/2 cuter, 2/2 hotter, and 1/1 sexier. I'm flattered, really. But the one person who said I was a better dancer better have been comparing me to someone in a wheel chair or something. Because if anyone knows anything about me, it's that I don't dance.

I'm pretty disappointed in this one: "more likely to do a favor for me". Only 2/4. I've always prided myself on being helpful. You just can't win them all.

Eureka!

2009-02-26T21:43:00.002-06:00

It suddenly occurred to me today that I have become a bit of a Northerner. By that, all I mean is that I have adjusted to cold weather. This is significant for two reasons: 1) I am from Texas. 2) I am rather skinny.

After doing almost everything outside for the last 6 weeks (in Virginia, during one of the coldest winters in memory, I'm told), it is clear why I have adjusted to the cold. Marching from place to place; exercises and runs; hikes; standing, waiting in formation. At one point I actually thought I had a tiny bit of frostbite on my two index fingers (I didn't).

Take today for instance. It was rainy and foggy - about 36 degrees. All I had to keep me warm was a sweat shirt. It felt nice. I am afraid I will lose this tolerance to cold over the summer, but it'll be nice while it lasts.

Recent doings

2009-02-21T22:52:00.003-06:00

This morning, it snowed about 6-7 inches here. It wasn't terribly cold - in the upper 20s - but it sure was snowing. Not so much hard as it was constant. My car looked almost completely white at one point, except for the tires. I doubt that will ever happen to that car again. I had to use the snow shovel to clear it off. Craziness.

I'm still here in Chicago with my aunt/uncle/7 cousins. I'll be here another week, then we're heading down to St. Louis for the wedding of another cousin, where I'll see my family for the first time since Jan 2. That isn't a terribly long time - 2 months - but we've been through a lot since then. Other than my own doings, of which you should be fully aware, my brother got engaged and was recently accepted into grad school; my parents are soon to be in-laws.

It's good here at the other Jumper's house. They feed me all I can eat (which is quite a lot since going to OCS), and the kids have mostly attached to me. The older ones in different ways than the younger ones, of course. It's like I've become another family member for the 2 weeks I'm here. I'll get to see my uncle preach tomorrow morning. I've seen him preach once or twice before, but it was like 10 or 15 years ago, so I don't remember it at all. Should be fun. Apparently, the choir is killer. I took most of the kids to see Paul Blart: Mall Cop this afternoon. It was pretty good, a great kids' movie. They enjoyed it as well. We had to shovel the driveway after dinner tonight so we'd be able to get to church in the morning. The two youngest girls mostly just climbed and played on the big piles of snow recently removed from the drive as everyone else shoveled. But it went pretty quickly. And of course, the occasional shovel was tossed onto a person instead of the pile. Good times.

The kids are all homeschooled. My aunt and uncle have sort of set it up so they slowly grow into an autonomous unit of kids educating kids. The older ones learn from books and such, then help the younger ones with their assignments. The ones in the middle do some bookwork on their own, get occasional help from the olders, and occasionally help the youngers. It's a neat system, actually. While I've been here, I've mostly been just making sure that everyone gets everything done that they're supposed to. Naturally, I help out where needed, but it mostly runs itself. In fact, the whole house is like that. I asked if I could help cook, but the girls were taking care of that. I didn't need to help do the dishes, because there were 2-3 kids to do that. Clearing the table was taken care of by another, and sweeping was taken care of by another. Each child has a job. With seven kids, there's plenty of hands. :-)

OK, wow. That was long. It sort of just all came out. And yes, I've been relaxing and recovering. I'll be here another week like I said, then to St. Louis for a wedding, then home (finally). As nice as they're treating me here, and as nice as it is to see family I never see, I can't wait to get back to the familiar.

Hooray Brother

2009-02-20T23:25:00.002-06:00

Dear Mr. Jumper:
We are very pleased to offer you admission to our PhD Program in Physics at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign for the fall 2009 semester. We are offering you financial support in the form of a nine-month teaching assistantship for the 2009-10 academic year followed by a two-month summer assistantship in either teaching or research. Included in this offer are a full tuition waiver, a partial fee waiver, and a stipend of [$$$] for the 11 months. Our department not only excels in graduate research but also in physics education and we provide a very stimulating environment for learning the methods of physics instruction.

My brother just got accepted into grad school. That's awesome. Way to go bro!

I believe I've mentioned it before, but it's very strange to see my brother going through what I've dubbed adult things. You see, I often still think of him as my little brother. He said, "But Ben, I am your little brother." To which I replied, "No, I mean my little brother." He's not old enough to graduate college and go to grad school! He's not old enough to get married! He's like...an adult now. What happened? How did I miss that transition? He went from "boy who almost didn't graduate high school" (sorry if I wasn't supposed to say that) to "mad-scientist/physicist/Etch-A-Sketch artist getting married and getting paid to go to grad school". What in the hoo-ha? Again, way to go bro. Way to go.

The End...For Now

2009-02-12T16:01:00.001-06:00

Hello, all! I'm writing to you as a civilian. Today, I was officially dropped from the USMC Officer Candidate School by request. To put it bluntly, I quit.

There were two main factors affecting my decision. First, I realized that my body just can't keep up with training - both physically and mentally. This week, my body started to give out. I almost fell asleep standing up a few times; I had bronchitis for about 2 weeks; I started losing concentration, becoming unable to perform simple tasks and remember simple details; I started getting double vision from lack of sleep; and I started getting more tired quicker than usual, as my body has had little-to-no recovery time from exercises. In addition, the exercises are getting progressively more difficult, but my body is not getting progressively stronger. I didn't have adequate time to prepare physically, nor did I work out hard and fast enough during the time I did have.

Second, I came to realize over the last two weeks that the Marine Corps just isn't for me. To be honest, I don't know what I was thinking applying to the Marines. I have no interest in ground forces or ground tactics or being an infantryman. None whatsoever. I think I was a bit blinded from the fact that I finally got an air contract. That covered my eyes to what was expected of me and what I would need to dedicate to obtain the goal of being a pilot.

So, I requested to be disenrolled from the program. Because of this choice, I have been forbidden from ever applying to the Marine Corps again, but I think I'm OK with that. The more I thought about it, the more I didn't want to be there. I have absolutely no idea where God wants me or what he has in store for me next, but I do know that it wasn't with the Marines.

I should be home in a week or two, after seeing more friends and family, so pray for safe travels and quick and plentiful rest and recuperation between now and then. Thanks for all the support thus far, and I'll see you soon!

Also, if you know of a job opening, let me know.

Liberty

2009-02-01T07:53:00.002-06:00

Hello, all! It's Ben! I'm writing from a computer in the hotel I stayed at last night during my first 24-hour liberty. I'll be getting this every weekend, except for one or two where my platoon will have to work on either Saturday or Sunday (in which case I'll have the other day off).

It's cold here. The physical demands are hurting my body. I am being pushed far beyond my limits. We get 2-5 hrs of sleep per night, we're yelled at constantly, we suck up food like a vacuum when we're given food, we fall asleep in classes (not recommended by the way), and we're all stressed out. But that's the point. Since the vast majority of candidates here are ground contracts and will probably end up in a combat zone within a year, they're trying to evaluate how we react to stress, fatigue, hunger, and disorientation. It's quite ingenious if you ask me.

One of the things that's making us (ASIDE: when I say 'us' I am referring to my platoon of 40-50 candidates) all so tired and cranky with each other is this: when one person screws up, the whole platoon pays. It's usually stupid stuff, like he called someone a Staff Sergeant instead of a Gunnery Sergeant. Or they didn't ask the question in the exact proper manner. Since we're all so tired and worn down, it was really beginning to take it's toll on us. I'm hoping that this weekend will let everyone clear their heads and get back on track this week so we can continue developing as a team.

I won't talk too much more now, but I do want you to know some things. 1.) I tried to quit this week. It's sooooo hard here - mostly just the physical demands for me. I talked to some people about it, and they changed my mind. But that's kind of where I am: on the verge. Just keep praying that I progress as I should and am able to persevere, no matter how difficult. 2.) It's really cold here. I'm pretty skinny. Pray that I can ignore the pain in my fingers or the chill and continue working and doing the things I am tasked to do. 3.) I miss my friends and family. If you can write, please do. Getting letters is a great morale booster. Just know that I don't exactly have time to write back, so I'll try to contact you directly (fb, phone, text, email, etc...) on my weekend liberty if I am able. News from the outside would be nice - world events, personal events, sports, politics, etc.

OK, I'd better get going to bathe and study for a test this afternoon. Have a great week everyone!

A Tiny Update

2009-01-26T07:00:00.002-06:00

Blog Post by the Mom...

We got another letter from Ben! How it seems the group is doing can be summed up in a tiny update...

Cold

Tired

Working very very very very very very very hard.

Can't receive packages, but letters appreciated!!

P.S. Did I mention...working very very very very very very very very very very hard,,,

News From Quantico!

2009-01-15T08:53:00.005-06:00

Blog Post by the Mom...

The much-anticipated "form letter" has arrived...and on actual marine stationery! Ben was able to give us his snail mail address...his only connection with the "outside world" for a while! The address will be posted on his Facebook, and I know he'd LOVE to hear from anyone... who still knows what a stamp is!

It truly was a form letter, with only a couple written in sentences at the bottom, but from this we learned that they've been doing a lot of waiting, and a lot of studying so far...and no liberty for 2 or 3 weeks at least.

Chicaaagooooooo!

2009-01-08T09:05:00.002-06:00

BLOG Post by Ben…as dictated to The Mom

I arrived safely at "the other" Jumpers' house late Monday night. I got to see some of the older kids who were able to stay up late to see me, but only to say hello before they went back to bed. Then I got to visit with my Aunt Ginger for a little bit, which was nice.

Tuesday morning the kids had to do a little bit of their home schooling since they'd been on vacation the previous week, so I went out running. I played with all seven of the kids a little bit before lunch. I had a wrestling match with the younger five kids - me against them - and they won one match, and I won the other. After lunch the kids went to the YMCA for a PE class with other home schooled families. While the kids were there, my Aunt Ginger and I went out to get coffee and talk and that was great! We went back to see the kids finishing up a hockey game on the gym floor, then proceeded back to the house to play and read and nap.

Ginger and the three boys and I went to meet my Uncle Mark at the church he pastors so they could show me their church. It was a nice, and the building apparently used to be a mansion. My Uncle Mark said that the second floor (which is all of the church offices now) used to be the living area with bedrooms and a kitchen, while the first floor was one giant swimming pool with a waterfall! I think church would be fun in a swimming pool! Too bad they didn't keep it that way! ;-)

Aunt Ginger went home, and Mark and the boys and I went on a little outing of our own. The first stop was a small little family winery so we could pick up a bottle of wine for Mark and I to share that night. The family who owns the place buys grapes from Sonoma Valley and mixes them themselves to get their own wine concoction. We tasted a few and they were all quite good! We ended up getting a cabernet sauvignon to go with the steak we were having for dinner that night. Then next door was a little candy shop so each of the boys got something, and Mark got a little something for Aunt Ginger. The girl at the candy shop had the most stereotypical northern Chicago accent I've ever heard in my life. It made me laugh a little bit! The final stop was a guitar shop because their oldest son, Andrew, is interested in learning guitar so Mark wanted to look at guitars and see about lessons. While we were out, the girls were home preparing dinner, which was delicious! *drools*

After the kids cleaned up and did dishes, I played with them until their bedtime. Once they were in bed, Mark and Ginger and I watched "An Officer and a Gentleman." It was a good movie...and good preparation for what's about to come!

Yesterday morning, I woke up early and got packed up so I could have breakfast and play with the kids one last time before I left. It had snowed during the night so I had to clean off the car before I got on the way. All the kids wanted me to stay one more day, but I couldn't because I had a long journey ahead of me. I felt bad having to go because they were fun.

I drove all the way to Akron, OH where I spent the night, and it snowed lightly pretty much the whole way there. This morning when I got out to the car, I guess the snow had blown in from one side because I had 2 or 3" of snow to dig through to get in my car, and the other side was clear!

I am currently driving through Pennsylvania on the way to Quantico, VA where I will spend the night and report to duty tomorrow morning! Wish me luck, and keep me in your prayers!

Prayers of a Six-Year Old

2009-01-08T09:00:00.002-06:00

BLOG Post by Ben…as dictated to The Mom

Dear God,

Thank you that Ben got to come here...and thank you that he got to have fun with us...ummmm...and please keep him safe when he goes to the war...and let his team win...and if they don't, please don't let the world explode...and please have mercy on his hair.

Amen.

As prayed by my cousin, Elizabeth.

The Mom Perspective

2009-01-06T10:42:00.004-06:00

Ben mentioned that I might post to his Blog now and then to put forth "the mom" perspective on what it's like for him to be off to the Marines. As he's starting out, I'd say his dad and I have had what I imagine to be the somewhat typical reactions - ranging from pride and excitement to joy that he's following his dream...and fear that he's following his dream (mostly the mom and not the dad on that last one). :-) The biggest thing for me so far has been coming to the surprising realization that when I'm a little emotional about him leaving Dallas, it's because I'm not only saying good bye to a son that I love, but also to a friend who I really like! Very cool to actually enjoy spending time with one's kids!

Go get 'em, Ben!

The Weekend

2009-01-06T10:18:00.003-06:00

BLOG Post by Ben…as dictated to The Mom 1/5pm

I drove up to Kansas City on Friday where I spent the night with my grandpa. Saturday morning he and I went to see my grandma in the memory care facility she just moved into. The visit was good. I had lunch with my cousin, Tim, who just broke up with his girlfriend, so we had some good guy-talk. The rest of the day was spent with everyone else. I saw all the rest of my cousins and aunts and uncles…and…the new baby! My cousin, Emily, just had a new baby, Sophie, and she is mighty cute! I visited with the older cousins, played with the younger cousins - good times were had by all. I had breakfast Sunday with my grandpa the next morning at his most favorite place in the whole wide world: Bob Evans. It was, as usual, delicious.

Then I drove out to Fulton, Missouri, which is in the center of the state, to meet my aunt and uncle (my dad's sister). They live on more than 200 acres out in the country with cattle, some woods, and some ponds - a good mix of land. I hand-fed some of the cows...and it was wet. I spent the night there Sunday night and my cousin Jeff and I drove to St. Louis Monday morning. In February, he'll be getting married in St Louis, and I unfortunately will not be able to attend. :-( We met for lunch with his fiancé, my grandparents on my dad's side, and my Uncle Mark who was in town for a church meeting. Again, good times were had by all. All the rest of the day was spent driving to Chicago with my Uncle Mark. He had flown down from Chicago one way so he could drive back with me and we would have some time to visit. I am mere minutes away from their house now so I will bid you all good night and prepare to greet my 7 cousins! Adios!

#490

2008-12-31T16:35:00.002-06:00

This will be my last post for a while. My mom will be picking up the slack for the next several weeks.

I'm about to leave work for the last time; we're all leaving early for New Years. I've worked here for at least part of every year - usually several months of every year - since 2000 except for 2007. It's a great company, and I love the people here. But, I am moving on to bigger things for my life. I'm super excited.

Tonight and tomorrow I'll finish packing, moving, and cleaning. Then I'll begin my trek north Friday morning. Wish me luck and keep me in your prayers!

Oh, and be on the look out for blog posts and emails from my mom.

____ School Musical

2008-12-31T08:25:00.003-06:00

You are probably all familiar with Disney's High School Musical. But what about Sunday School Musical? For those who don't know her, my friend Rachel saw this when renting a movie from the RedBox. It makes me laugh.

Big Blue

2008-12-29T22:33:00.005-06:00

I stopped at a gas station today to grab a drink. While browsing, I saw something both very familiar and very strange: Big Blue.

It looked exactly like Big Red, a drink I've known forever, but was blue. What is this strange drink? I asked myself. I looked around, and lo, Big Red was only a few shelves down below Big Blue. I must try this mysterious drink. I need to try it. It will be tried. So I bought one. It tasted exactly like Big Red. But it was blue. I don't know what to make of it. Why do they have two drinks that taste exactly the same, but are different colors? Very strange. Very strange, indeed.

UPDATE: I was trying to check out their website, but it kept failing. I just checked again, and it worked, but Big Blue isn't listed anywhere in their product line. On the side of the bottle, it says it's by Big Red. Where did it come from? I believe it was the gnomes.

Personal (Girls)

2008-12-26T23:20:00.003-06:00

OK, I was lying in bed not sleeping, and I decided I should to talk to you about what was on my mind. I haven't been very personal in the past like this, but that's something I'm working on. So here it goes....

Girls.

Girls keep me up at night. Most guys would say the same thing. But I'm not talking about those girls. I'm talking about actual girls. Girls I know. You see, I've dated only a couple of girls, and it didn't work out. There was one I really liked, and it was going really well. Then she ended it. I still think about her and what could have been. (which is very unproductive. but if it's productive, shouldn't the opposite be antiductive?) There are a couple of girls I know whom I've wanted to date, but couldn't because they were (or are still) dating another guy. You might say, "But Ben, who cares? Just go for it anyway! Make her choose, and leave it up to fate!" But I have a problem with that. If another guy tried to steal my girlfriend like that, I'd probably want to run him over with my car. Twice. It's just not right; I can't do it. (that's what I get for growing up in the South)

I do know quite a lot of girls. In fact, some of my very best friends are girls. Most of the girls I know I don't want to date - not because they're hideous or witches or anything; I'm just not attracted to them in that way, you know? But what about the ones I do want to date? What do I do? I'm about to leave for many months of training in the military, so should I tell them and see what happens? Or should I just try to forget about it? I mean, after all, I will be gone for a long time. Why bother? Or is it that I've just been around them so much I think I want to date them, but after a while apart I'll realize I really don't? What if they move away? What if I never come back? Will I ever see them again? This is what keeps me up at night.

I've spent the last 2 years trying to answer these questions. And here I am, problems unsolved. I've decided I have too much respect for relationships to try to nudge out another guy. It's just not my style. At least I know the type of girl I like. I've noticed patterns in personality, character, ideals, etc. of girls I'm attracted to. That's good to know I guess. I've always had excuses for not asking girls out like "I'm too poor right now" or "we work together, so I'll wait until one of us leaves" or "I don't have a car. That would be awkward." All of these may seem like valid points, but I think maybe I was just unsure of myself. Though, it doesn't help to know that now - I can't change the past. So I guess I can only apply that knowledge to the future.

Also, I think when I was younger I convinced myself that someone would just drop down into my life and I would know what to do and we would live happily ever after. And I think I've continued to believe that all the way through last year. I guess I sort of forgot about the part where I live my life, not someone else. Crap.

I think the fact that I haven't dated much plays a big part in how I approach relationships. I'm not entirely sure how to walk down that road. My dad always tried to get me to date lots of people through high school and college just to get an idea of how to date and who I liked, but I never saw the point. Why would I date someone just to date them? Shouldn't you date people you actually like? I sort of wish I had now, just to see how to play the game better. But again, I can't change the past. Deep down I want to be married. I don't want to have to go through the whole process of dating and being engaged and everything. I just want to be married and have some kids. There, I said it. I've always said you shouldn't date someone you wouldn't want to marry. But how do you know you don't want to marry them if you don't date them?

You become friends with them and hang out and watch them date other guys because you didn't ask them out and then torment over what to do and wonder if you'll ever get married and think about who you'd want to date and figure out how to meet that person and then become friends with them and hang out.... It's a vicious cycle in my head. And it keeps me up at night.

ESPN's NFL Power Rankings

2008-12-24T13:49:00.004-06:00

I'm in a Pigskin Pick 'Em league on ESPN's website with some friends from UNT. It's tons of fun. Each week, you choose which teams you think will win their games. How can it not be fun?

I discovered that ESPN ranks all the NFL teams each week according to how well they played last season, how well they've played this season, who they've beaten and by how much, etc. I thought it would be fun to track how different teams did over the season, so I made a chart (below). Click on it to expand and get the full picture. The teams are organized how they were ranked on week 17.

Most consistent: Kansas City Chiefs (varied by 4 - best of 27, worst of 31)
Least consistent: Atlanta Falcons (varied by 25 - best of 7, worst of 32)
Best average: New York Giants (2.5 avg - best of 1, worst of 8)
Worst average: Detroit Lions (31.2 avg - best of 26, worst of 32)

Rules for a gun, knife, baseball bat, or fist fight

2008-12-23T09:15:00.003-06:00

My uncle sent me this. I laughed so much while reading it, I had to pass it along to you. Sorry if it's a bit long, but it's totally worth it.

1. Forget about knives, bats, and fists. Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns. Bring four times the ammunition you think you could ever need.

2. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammunition is cheap, life is expensive. A new wall is cheap, funerals are expensive. If you shoot inside, buckshot is your friend.

3. Only hits count. The only thing worse than a miss is a slow miss.

4. If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough or using cover correctly.

5. Move away from your attacker and go to cover. Distance is your friend. (Bulletproof cover and diagonal or lateral movement are preferred.)

6. If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a semi or full-automatic long gun and a friend with a long gun.

7. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.

8. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating, reloading, and running. Yell "Fire!" Why "Fire"? Cops will come with the Fire Department; sirens often scare off the bad guys or at least cause then to lose concentration and will. And who is going to summon help if you yell "Intruder!", "Glock!" or "Winchester!"?

9. Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on "pucker factor" than the inherent accuracy of the gun.

10. Someone may someday kill you with your own gun. But they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.

11. Always cheat, always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.

12. Have a plan.

13. Have a back-up plan, because the first one won't work.

14. Use cover or concealment as much as possible, but remember, sheetrock walls and the like stop nothing but your pulse when bullets tear through them.

15. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.

16. Don't drop your guard.

17. Always tactical load and threat scan 360 degrees. Practice reloading one-handed and off-hand shooting. That's how you live if hit in your "good" side.

18. Watch their hands. Hands kill. Smiles, frowns and other facial expressions do not.

19. Decide now to always be aggressive enough, quickly enough.

20. The faster you finish the fight, the fewer times you'll get shot.

21. Be polite. Be professional. But have a plan to kill everyone you meet if necessary, because they may want to kill you.

22. Be courteous to everyone, overly friendly to no one.

23. Your number one option for personal security is a lifelong commitment to avoidance, deterrence, and de-escalation.

24. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun, the caliber of which does not start with anything smaller than 4.

25. Use a gun that works EVERY TIME. "All skill is in vain when an Angel blows the powder from the flintlock of your musket." At a practice session, throw you gun into the mud, then make sure it still works. You can clean it later.

26. Practice shooting in the dark, with someone shouting at you, when out of breath, etc.

27. Regardless of whether you were justified or not, you will feel sad about killing another human being. It is better to be sad than to be room temperature.

28. The only thing you EVER say afterward is, "He said he was going to kill me. I believed him. I'm sorry, officer, but I'm very upset now. I can't say anything more. Please speak with my attorney."

Mail Call

2008-12-21T23:09:00.001-06:00

Several of you have asked how to contact me while I'm gone to training for the next several months. The best way is by snail mail. In fact, that might be the only way. I've decided to have my mom send out mass emails periodically to everyone I know with updates on Ben as they come, and I'll have her put in my address on one of the first ones. Oh, that reminds me - I have to ask my mom to do that.

All Aboard The Fail Train

2008-12-19T16:00:00.001-06:00

T-minus 14

2008-12-19T11:27:00.002-06:00

In exactly 2 weeks, I'll be somewhere in Oklahoma on my way to Kansas City, MO. That will be the first leg in my one-week journey to see family on the way to OCS in Quantico. I'm getting more and more excited as it gets closer to the date. The only problem is that I'm getting more and more excited as it gets closer to the date.

It's like senioritis in high school or college - you're a senior who's about to graduate, and you just can't wait to get out. Maybe you're literally counting down the days. Maybe you can't concentrate any more. There are many symptoms, but all are equally disruptive to the daily routine. It might just be the difficulty of my tasks at work over the last few days, but I've found myself getting more frustrated than normal. I've also noticed that I'm checking email, RSS feeds, or news sites more frequently than I used to. It's like my heart is already gone and it's trying to convince my mind and body to go with it.

So, I'd ask that you wish me luck as I begin my journey in two weeks and pray for my focus and concentration in the mean time. Thanks!

Microsoft: Quick Fix for IE7

2008-12-17T12:58:00.002-06:00

I just saw this story on BBC News. Apparently, there is a security hole in IE7 that could allow hackers to take over computers and steal passwords. The update should be available already.

ASIDE: I don't use my home PC every day. In fact, I probably use it about twice per week. But every time I turn it on, I see updates for various Microsoft programs. Why do they require so many updates? Why not just make it work the first time?

This is a curious story. Toward the end, I read this: "Some experts have suggested that users switch browsers until the flaw is fixed. Firefox, Opera, Chrome and Apple's Safari system are not vulnerable to this current flaw." Wha??? If I'm using a program that requires me to use a competing program because of flaws, why would I ever go back?

As I've mentioned before, I started using Google Chrome at work when it was released. It had a couple of things wrong with it during the first two weeks in Beta, but has been excellent ever since. On my PC at home, I use Mozilla Firefox. It appears that Chrome is inspired by Firefox, so it was an easy transition at work. Firefox has an update or two every 4-6 weeks by my estimation, and I've never seen one for Chrome. They just work. This news story emphasizes my belief that Microsoft is the way of the past. I believe Google and Apple have taken the reigns and will continue to grow and gain a larger market share each year for the foreseeable future. Microsoft is on the way out.

Oh, by the way, when I have money to do so, I will probably be purchasing a new MacBook.

#480

2008-12-17T12:10:00.005-06:00

If you bank with Chase, you've probably seen some of the drive-thrus with cameras. It's so you can see the teller and they can see you. I kind of like it because it adds a face to the voice.

I just went to the bank on the way to lunch and saw this.

They were playing The Fox and the Hound on the little screen. Awesome! Then when the teller spoke, I saw her, and when I spoke, she saw me. It made my day.

Happy Holidays from GraphJam

2008-12-16T12:27:00.000-06:00

Run The Rock

2008-12-15T09:08:00.002-06:00

Yesterday, I ran the rock. And then I walked it.

I was part of a 5-man relay team that completed the 26.2-mile marathon in Dallas yesterday morning. I was the second leg, and ran the shortest distance of 4 miles. But since I've been training for only 3 miles for the Marines, it was a bit tiring. The other guys have been training for like 10 or something, so 5 or 6 miles wasn't too bad for them. I was running late, so I just parked my car at the first hand-off point -- mile 6. There were buses to shuttle people around after each leg, so I was going to get a ride back to my car and head home.

But it turns out they only take you back to the starting point. Crap. I could (a) wait for the bus to fill up to get a ride back and wait for a couple hours for my team to finish and take me to my car or (b) walk back the same way I just ran, which would probably only take about an hour. Naturally, I chose (b). So I ran 4 miles in just over 30 minutes, then walked 4 miles in about an hour. My legs hurt today.

But it was fun. I got a shirt and a medal. Oh, and our team finished in 3:59:15. That's about a 9-minute mile on average. Not too bad.

Revenge of the Cleaning Crew

2008-12-10T08:38:00.004-06:00

A couple months ago I noticed that the cleaning crew was throwing away things from my desk here at work. Nothing really important, but little things like extra napkins from lunch, a water bottle or cup, some extra pretzels that I hadn't finished.

But I didn't want any of those things thrown away. I keep extra napkins because I regularly forget to pick some up. So when I sit down to eat lunch and realize I didn't grab any napkins, I have a couple extra there at my desk. I reuse water bottles and cups for a week at a time, at least. I don't want to be wasteful. I love pretzels. I don't think you understand. If there was a way I could marry a bag of pretzels, I would. And it would happen so fast, you would be mad at me for not inviting you to the wedding. But I didn't invite anyone. It just sort of happened - after lunch yesterday.

It's the principle of the matter. I don't want them just throwing away whatever they think is trash. What if it actually is important? To remedy the situation, I put a couple of sticky notes on the side of my computer monitor saying, "Cleaning Crew: Please DO NOT throw away anything on the desk." That solved the problem, so I threw away the sticky notes. That was all Oct-Nov.

I left a water bottle on my desk last night to fill up and reuse today. It was gone when I arrived this morning. I just don't understand. I'm trying to recycle and be responsible and everything, and they keep foiling my efforts! Alas, the sticky notes are being re-written as we speak.

Gmail (beta)

2008-12-09T11:19:00.004-06:00

As defined by Wikipedia, the beta release of a software program is

...the stage in which a feature complete software, known as Beta Release or Beta Version is released to enthusiastic public for software testing before its official release. Beta testing allows the software to undergo usability testing with users who provide feedback, so that any malfunctions these users find in the software can be reported to the developers and fixed.

You may also note that

...beta version software is likely to be useful for internal demonstrations and previews to select customers, but unstable and not yet ready for release. Some developers refer to this stage as a preview, a prototype, a technical preview (TP) or as an early access.

I bring this up for a very important reason. Google's email service, Gmail, has been considered a Beta release ever since it was released, March 2004. That's closing in on 5 years. But let's look deeper at each part:

is released...for software testing before its official release
When is Gmail's official release? As it hasn't happened yet, I assume some time in the future. This, by definition, means that Gmail is still in its unofficial release stages.

allows the software to undergo usability testing
Indeed. There has been MUCH usability testing with Gmail over the years. I've sent in a couple of comments myself to improve the service.

but unstable and not yet ready for release
Unstable? Certainly not. For as long as I've been using Gmail, I don't remember any stability issues. It's always seemed to work quite well for me.

a preview, a prototype, ...or as early access
I have a hard time believing that this is a mere "preview" or "prototype". They've steadily added more and more features over the years that it makes me ask, When will software be considered "ready" for release? In today's world, technology advances so quickly that it is almost silly to think that once they officially release they won't add to it.

So why is Gmail still in its beta phase? I have no idea. It seems to me like it shouldn't be. But I don't make millions or work for Google. Eh...

Tomorrow, you should call in gay to work

2008-12-09T10:55:00.003-06:00

That's right, you heard me. The AP reported this story about how gays want to take a day off to (a) protest the recent Proposition 8 vote in California, and (b) to show the world how much it relies on gays and lesbians. I can't believe they devoted 853 words to this "story".

Car Doings

2008-12-08T10:32:00.002-06:00

Last week I pulled up to some friends' house for home group and saw a hint of smoke coming out from under my hood. I popped it open and saw radiator fluid everywhere. It was even on the hood itself. After group, I a few of us looked at it, and some thought that the cap might be bad or something. We wiped everything down as best we could, and I drove around to heat up the engine again. Nothing happened. So, they said maybe it was just pressure from the change in temperature that made it pop or something. Cool, not a big deal. But since I had to be down in Arlington the next morning, I drove to my parents' house to borrow their car for a day or two. Just to be safe.

Saturday, I went to take my car back home. When I got home, I saw fluid everywhere again. So, I bought a new radiator cap. It did nothing. But I did discover a very tiny hole in the top of the radiator. Huzzah! The puzzle is solved! Oh wait. Now I need a new radiator. Crap.

Quotes of the Day

2008-12-08T08:58:00.001-06:00

Platitude: an idea (a) that is admitted to be true by everyone, and (b) that is not true.
- H. L. Mencken

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
- Robert Orben

Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.
- Frank Zappa

Endless Entertainment

2008-12-08T08:48:00.001-06:00

I saw this on one of the blogs I follow. Awesome.

Defensive Driving

2008-12-07T11:08:00.000-06:00

I got a speeding ticket a few weeks ago. I paid half, and I'm currently sludging through defensive driving, and it blows. I don't know if you've ever done the online version, but it has the high-quality production and entertainment value of those videos from the 1980s that you had to watch in driver's ed classes. You know, the ones with the splattered brains all over the roads, huge glasses, big hair and clothes, cheesy script? Yeah, those.

This is what it makes me feel like.

Tim Hawkins - Corporate Worship Songs

2008-12-02T14:06:00.001-06:00

Fantasy Football

2008-12-02T12:41:00.003-06:00

I've been playing in a fantasy football league each of the last few years with some friends. It's been fun, and my team has been great this year (even considering I lost Tom Brady during the first game). But I just can't catch a break. It seems like people have their best game the week they play me. This has led to me being 5th place, but with the most points! ¡De ninguna manera!

Making Democrats Fume

2008-12-01T12:02:00.002-06:00

A friend of mine sent me an email just now with a way to make Democrats furious. If Bush resigns, Cheney would become President. He could then appoint Condoleeza Rice as his VP. Cheney could then resign, making Rice the first black President and the first woman President. (...and she's a Republican)

That makes me giggle.

Quotes of the Day

2008-12-01T08:52:00.001-06:00

The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
- Samuel Johnson

The word 'meaningful' when used today is nearly always meaningless.
- Paul Johnson

If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
- Robert X. Cringely

Thanksgiving

2008-11-30T16:03:00.002-06:00

I really do have a lot to be thankful for. A great family, great friends. Good job now, another good job in less than 6 weeks. Enough money to get by and save a little extra.

We were up in Missouri this week seeing my mom's family - 2 aunts/uncles, 8 cousins, 2 grandparents. My grandma is not doing well. She had a minor stroke about 2 weeks ago, and is 'recovering' at an assisted living-type facility (I feel like it's called something else, but I can't remember). I'm not sure she'll ever change much from how she is now, but maybe. She has Alzheimer's and wasn't doing too great anyway, so the stroke didn't change a lot. It mostly just made her almost void of emotion and responsiveness. Almost, but not entirely. She can hardly hear, can't talk much, and is confined to a bed or wheelchair as best I can tell.

Sometimes while we were talking to her, it looked like she was just blankly staring at us. But other times, she responded or even laughed. It's very strange. Either way, I'm suddenly at a point where her death is at the forefront of my mind. It's entirely possible that she could die before New Years. Or, she could go on for two more years. Who knows? But just seeing her bedroom at home empty makes it real, you know? I've only had 2 close relatives die in my lifetime, both before the age of 13, so I don't really know how I'll handle it.

Meanwhile, the 2nd oldest cousin (I'm the oldest) is going to spit out a baby in about a month. That's crazy. Her due date is the 28th, but I've got my money on Jan 1. Sorry, Em and Caity, but I think it'll come late. But what do I know?

OK, I guess that's all for now. T-minus 40.

Life Doings of El Ben

2008-11-25T19:45:00.002-06:00

If I haven't told you yet, I'm sorry. I should have.

I have news. I joined the Marines. On Friday, I signed the contract and swore the oath. It's all official. I report to Quantico, VA on January 9. After about 9 months of officer school and basic, I'll go on to pilot training for a year-and-a-half or so. I'm sooooooo excited. Oh man. You have no idea.

Oh, and I'm mostly sick. I'm afraid I'll be all the way sick tomorrow. No es bueno.

g-speak

2008-11-19T09:45:00.000-06:00

g-speak overview 1828121108 from john underkoffler on Vimeo.

Pants

2008-11-14T10:44:00.001-06:00

You'll need a new pair after watching this:

Ben: Verizon Technician extraordinaire

2008-11-13T16:36:00.002-06:00

Oops. Wrong Ben. I keep getting calls from Verizon "dispatch" by people who think I'm out on a job, running Verizon cable through the ground. Apparently, a Verizon employee (also named Ben) has a phone number starting with 769, versus mine starting with 789. Very close if the ink is smudged on the paper or the computer monitor is slightly out of focus. I'm starting to get a good laugh out of it. Be nice to me, or I'll transfer them to your number. ;-)

Audiogasm

2008-11-13T12:30:00.002-06:00

OK, OK. I know I like adding "gasm" to the end of words. (Mostly just to make people a bit uncomfortable.) But seriously, Jack Conte is the man. Check out his rendition of the James Bond 007 theme song: